We’ve been on trains where:

- A woman refused to pay the fare and the conductor called the police who were waiting for her at the next stop. Busted;

- We’ve forgotten to composter (stamp the ticket in the little machines, obligatory before you board a train) and sat in a bucket of sweat hoping the conductor wouldn’t fine us – he took pity on the two idiots and didn’t;

- We’ve jumped on trains going in the wrong direction. Oops. Had to get off at the next available stop and catch a train heading to the right town;

overnight train in Turkey
- We trained through Europe in 1978 before they accepted credit cards for food with no clue that smart travelers buy food to eat on train. With our five children, no foreign currency left (it was the end of a one month trip B.E. – Before Euro) and the seven of us starved the entire day until the train arrived in Luxembourg;

Take Eurostar from London to Paris!

- We’ve traveled across politically sensitive borders where police and customs came on, tore out the ceiling panels and seats looking for refugees. That was frightening and reminiscent of Nazi war films;

- We had roaches on an Indian train and mice racing along the train floor in Myanmar;

- We’ve sat on trains that came to a stop at the end of the line, not knowing that it was the end of the line and time to change trains, until another passenger took pity on the American dumkopfs and explained the facts of life. Memorize these words: einsteigen in German, correspondance in French, and when announcements are made in another language, you’ll change to another train;

- We’ve been on trains that separate along the route. One heading, let’s say to Nice, while the other car continues to your destination, Perpignan. This is posted on most train windows and relevant only if you aren’t on a TGV and don’t have reservations. Do not sit in the wrong car or you’ll end up at the wrong destination;

- We’ve been on trains with “silence” cars. (This is relatively new.) It said “silence” but who knew it meant no talking until another passengers chastised and pointed us into another car that you were allowed to talk in; and the Number One Cardinal Mistake —

inside an Indian train (first class, believe it or not)
Waiting too long to make seat reservations during peak seasons and on weekends If it costs more to make on-line through Rail Europe, do it! Make as far in advance as possible, 60 days isn’t too far. Read, watch and weep over one disastrous day in France and you’ll understand.